i am weak
this morning, i was going to cover one of my co-interns during the day, in exchange for one of my shifts in May. i was going to be post-call, but thankfully my night after about 11pm was quiet, and i slept about 5 hours before getting up to draw all the patient's labs - in the hopes of getting home early.
at 7:35a, my chief comes to me and tells me that what we've set up violates the resident-protection laws, and i need to go home. i'm crestfallen, but i also feel so stupid. DUH. i didn't think it would be a big issues - and we even emailed the chiefs and told them ahead of time, but i guess we didn't make the situation totally clear.
but praise God, in His grace, He provided a back-up call person who i can pay back in April. praise praise God. and even better, his co-intern is a good friend of mine. :)
this experience really humbled me - i think i was trying to take too much into my own hands. now, still, i have 2 more shifts that need to be covered, and i'm working on them - but i'm so thankful that my ignorance did not turn into disaster. i have such disregard for rules and regulations sometimes (remember the biking incident!) - i think God is continuing to remind me that RULES MATTER - and that we should do our best to obey them.
i was also humbled today again - to know that i can hurt someone i love soo deeply with my words and actions - especially when i am thoughtless. i need to continually confess and repent, confess and repent - and stand on God's mercy. i have begun to fast - so far i've only gotten through breakfast and lunch (lasting until 3pm). this thursday i would like to fast until 6pm. i think God knows that i need to see fruit to keep going with this - and He's already shown me fruit in little ways - helping me to understand my innards - the roots of my sin. all my fears - especially of abandonment and rejection - take root in not knowing how loved I am by God my Father, my Lord Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit my Counselor. Lord, sustain me by Your grace!
thank you for those who have responded to praying for me - i look forward to praying with you and for you. :) with much love... ~c
at 7:35a, my chief comes to me and tells me that what we've set up violates the resident-protection laws, and i need to go home. i'm crestfallen, but i also feel so stupid. DUH. i didn't think it would be a big issues - and we even emailed the chiefs and told them ahead of time, but i guess we didn't make the situation totally clear.
but praise God, in His grace, He provided a back-up call person who i can pay back in April. praise praise God. and even better, his co-intern is a good friend of mine. :)
this experience really humbled me - i think i was trying to take too much into my own hands. now, still, i have 2 more shifts that need to be covered, and i'm working on them - but i'm so thankful that my ignorance did not turn into disaster. i have such disregard for rules and regulations sometimes (remember the biking incident!) - i think God is continuing to remind me that RULES MATTER - and that we should do our best to obey them.
i was also humbled today again - to know that i can hurt someone i love soo deeply with my words and actions - especially when i am thoughtless. i need to continually confess and repent, confess and repent - and stand on God's mercy. i have begun to fast - so far i've only gotten through breakfast and lunch (lasting until 3pm). this thursday i would like to fast until 6pm. i think God knows that i need to see fruit to keep going with this - and He's already shown me fruit in little ways - helping me to understand my innards - the roots of my sin. all my fears - especially of abandonment and rejection - take root in not knowing how loved I am by God my Father, my Lord Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit my Counselor. Lord, sustain me by Your grace!
thank you for those who have responded to praying for me - i look forward to praying with you and for you. :) with much love... ~c
posted by Where? Who? How? at
12:57 PM
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